Commas

Never put a period where God has put a comma.
-- Gracie Allen quoted in the (Protestant) United Church of Christ's God Is Still Speaking Campaign

In singing, commas provide places to take a breath. It indicates a pause, but more is coming. This isn't the post I had planned to write next, but the Universe is putting in a comma. I've had a sudden reversal in my employment situation. Yes, I know, that's the name of the game when you're temping. Still, I had been told on Friday it would go through March. Two more months of steady income and security. That seemed assured today as well, when I talked about it again with my "boss". But then later this afternoon, she informed me that it seems they don't have enough computers upstairs. We've been working in a makeshift computer room in the basement of the government center. And they have to be out of this room at the end of the week. So now my last day is Friday.

I try to be as resilient as possible, but at the moment I am a little bit in shock, and am just going to have to go with that while the emotions sort themselves into some kind of composure that allows me to deal with whatever I decide I need to do next. I know that the first step in accepting what cannot be changed, is to acknowledge what your expectations were. It's okay to be sad and disappointed. But recognize that it is the expectation that sets you up for the feelings of loss, grief, frustration, anger. Still, it needs to be acknowledged. Give yourself time to breath. This is one of life's commas. More is coming.

A little bit of humor here: I love the stuff that shows up synchronously in my email. The comma quote was one. Another one that showed up today is this:

"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
-- Benjamin Franklin (and often attributed to others, as well)

I was just saying to a friend that the Universe keeps putting me in this precarious position over and over, and expecting me to do something different. I'm coping as well as anybody can. I'm feeling relatively positive. I'm making big changes in my life -- I mean BIG changes. I'm
determined to be proactive in creating my life. So what's the lesson I'm not getting?

Ha! Now I get it! The Universe is Insane!! Bwah hahahahahahah.

That fits quite well with what I wrote in my annual New Year's letter about Life being Hopeless. I'll have to post that letter next. Some people I sent it to didn't understand how I could say life is hopeless. They equated it with hopelessness, which was exactly the opposite of what I was feeling and trying to communicate. I think it's a Zen thing. You either get it, or you don't. By letting go of hope, i.e. the expectation that the Universe should be somehow logical, and that life is something that you can figure out, I discovered the freedom to create my reality. When you hope for certain things, and don't get them, it can be very hard to bear. But if life is hopeless, then anything can happen, even miracles.

More is coming.